Playing Tag

Last week Nathalie tagged me and I’m just now fulfilling my duties. I will choose five occupations from those listed below, and then explain to you, what I would do if I were able to pursue that particular line of work.

The choices are:
scientist, farmer, musician, doctor, painter, gardener, missionary, chef, architect, linguist, psychologist, librarian, athlete, lawyer, inn-keeper, professor, writer, llama-rider, bonnie pirate, astronaut, world-famous blogger, justice in any one court of the world, married to any current famous political figure.

If I were a FARMER, I would live in battered, noble farmhouse with two collie dogs and a farmer husband. And we would not be very good farmers because sometimes, if we were in the middle of a really good book, we would neglect our farm and let the weeds grow. We would sit in the sunshine in the spring and sip coffee on our porch and contemplate the glorious flowers and vegetables we would grow. We would grow everything organically and the apples and pears would have notty little worm holes but we wouldn’t care. We’d just cut the wormy parts out and make giant, slurpy batches of applesauce and pear butter and preserve them in glass jars sitting on our shelves. We’d have bee hives buzzing near the back door. We would go to bed at night, sweaty and tired and knowing we had done an honest day’s labor. We would sleep with no worries about tomorrow.

If I were a PAINTER, I would paint a man with a mysterious smile–like the male equivalent of the Mona Lisa. And people would wonder just exactly what that man was thinking, and I would never tell any one. And the rest of my paintings would be huge abstract sploshes of color across canvases and walls. Green the color of granny smith apples and new grass. Reds the color of blood and roses and Rainier cherries. Yellows that shown like sunshine. Smudges of chocolate–that if you stuck your nose up to the canvas you would realize really were chocolate. And I wouldn’t care that no one else enjoyed these juicy, sloppy paintings because I would experience such joy creating them myself.

If I were an ARCHITECT, I would design simple, decent places for people who need that sort of thing. I would use local stone and wood and dirt. I would hide secret rooms within my plans that could only be discovered by those curious enough to investigate the dark corners of rooms and the insides of closets. The secret room in my house would be painted deep red and lined with bookshelves. It would only have enough room for a chair and a reading light. It would be called the Womb and you would find me there late at night when insomnia plagues me.

If I were a DOCTOR, I would go work with Nathalie because she is brilliant and compassionate and real. And I would just try to be kind and not muck anything up. “Above all, do no wrong.”

If I were a PROFESSOR, I’d research the brain–not just the neuroscience but also the mysterious workings of human thoughts and emotions. I’d bring in students who are struggling in school and find out exactly what was going on in their heads and then I’d help them understand how to use their strengths to compensate for their weaknesses. I would invite my students to my house for dessert and we’d talk late into the night and pretend we were erudite and astute. And we would solve all the problems of public education in the United States (hah).

That’s what I would do.

Now, I’m supposed to tag somebody else–so Cris , you’re it! And Sarah and Andrew, you’d better start blogs soon so I can tag you!

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